Brothers and Sisters,
This world is a harsh place. After you've been burned a few times; after you've pushed away from the pain; after you've "learned your lesson"; what is left? Your heart becomes a barricaded fortress, cold as stone, impenetrable by the mortal's love. Sin no longer hurts, guilt has no access, and the Holy Spirit has lost entrance. You ger to the point where it doesn't matter what you do, because you've done it all before. Except this time, it doesn't hurt. You can dance to a thousand songs with a thousand lovers, but at the end of the night, they haven't scratched the surface of your heart, buried deep in a cavern of stone. Do you wonder if it is still sin, since it doesn't hurt? Do you wonder if it is still wrong, since you can't hear that soft whisper telling you to flee?
Let me encourage you, precious one, that there is still a heart that beats for your Savior, though it hasn't been touched in an age. Let me remind you that sin is relative to God who never chances, and not to how or what you feel. And let me admonish you to pursue righteousness just because you know it's there, regardless of all else.
You see, there are times when our feelings confuse us. Every one of the individuals of the human race has been duped by emotions at least once. These fleeting desires will grab at you, pull you, push you, and nag you until you break or go numb. The one and only way to determine which way is up is to find God. He is our true north. By Him you can decide what is good and right to do, though you can't feel it. And it is He who will melt your frozen soul or mend your broken heart.
Trust me; just take ten minutes out of your day to pray, or listen to a worship song. When you do, offer up your cry for healing. Even if all you give Him is ten minutes and a genuine call for help, you will feel your soul begin to melt. The next day, return to Him and He will finish the work He has begun in you. Like raw new skin, you will feel the burn. It will hurt, yes, But at least you can feel it! The healing process begins right away, He reminds you He loves you still, and you can sense His radiant joy at your return.
So you see, beloved, all it takes is one step. The Lord is waiting, ever patiently for you to acknowledge His righteousness, and to admit that you have pushed Him out of your life. And really, thats exactly what happened. It's not like you said "Goodbye God". It just happened slowly, with each task you attended to, thinking "God is patient..." Do not be fooled into that process again! Allow God to be first in your life.